I’m a fat bastard

After having attended two feasts yesterday, I think I’ve eaten enough Christmas dinners to last me until next year. But it’s not over yet because I have another Christmas party to attend to tonight. This Christmas has been a fairly busy Christmas compared to last year. In the previous year, I had Christmas dinner at home and that was it. At least, that’s all I remember. I’m getting too old to remember every little Christmas dinners I attend. It’s a good thing I have a blog to help me with my memory.

Last week, my boss from the library asked if I would like to attend a Christmas luncheon. I wasn’t sure of my schedule at the time so I didn’t give him a straight answer. I knew that I would be working the night shift so it would be a little hard to get up before noon to attend the gathering. I gave him a definite maybe. He was looking for a definite yes or no but I couldn’t give him one.

When I dropped by the library on Monday, my coworkers asked again if I will be attending the luncheon. I told them that I’ll be sleeping around the time the luncheon starts. My coworker told me that she’ll be finishing up her night shift as well and she didn’t have a problem attending. Not wanting to be beaten by a girl, I said that I would attend.

Everyone brought in something to the luncheon so I brought something as well. I didn’t make it though because I can’t cook to save my life. I went to the Chinese bakery and picked up a few things. It wasn’t anything big, just some pastries.

The luncheon started around 2:00pm and didn’t finish until just after 4:00pm. Although I didn’t eat much, I was full after eating a plate full of Chinese food. I didn’t want to eat too much because I have a dinner to attend to as well.

After all the eating was done, another coworker started handing out some gifts that she bought for everyone. Surprisingly, I received something as well. I don’t work at the library any longer so I didn’t think I was going to receive anything but there in front of me was a gift with a card that had my name on it. I guess since I’m visiting so often, it doesn’t seem like I’ve left at all.
The gift was a cup with some stuff inside of it. There was a box of Lindor chocolates, a candy cane and a lottery ticket. I didn’t win on the lottery, never do anyway. But I got a cup and chocolates, which is good enough for me.

After the luncheon, everyone started to pack up to leave. I stood by the security desk for a while before leaving. The other coworkers parted and went their separate ways. As I was talking to one of them, some old lady with white hair and a pack of smoke approached the security desk. I thought she needed assistants with something but instead, she proceeds to do the robot. I was standing there, trying not to laugh. I thought this lady was deaf or something. At first, I thought she was doing sign language but then it looked more like the robot. So it was like a sign language that only people who grew up in the 80’s would understand. After she was finished doing her little dance, the lady went outside and had herself a smoke. My coworker and I just stared at each other because we were puzzled about what had just happened. It’s not every day that someone comes up to your and starts disco dancing and then leaves.

I left the library to go home for a while. Within two hours time, I had to meet up with some more people and eat some more food. I was already full from the lunch so I was hoping that the two will be enough time for the food to digest in my stomach. It didn’t help much but it did help a little.

I met up with some friends from high school and college up at the Mandarin on Upper James. My friend estimated that there would be no more than twenty of us attending. When I got to the Mandarin, I saw that there were a few people waiting outside. It was rather cold so I don’t know why they didn’t just go inside to wait. I guess it would be easy for the others to spot them if they were outside.

After waiting around for about five minutes or so, the coldness was unbearable so we all went inside and got seated. The place was packed with customers but we managed to secure the VIP section. The VIP section had seats available to accompany twenty people but we weren’t sure if all twenty seats were going to be used.

We were at the Mandarin for three hours, talking, joking and just catching up on things. I didn’t know everyone that attended but I knew most of the people that were seated at my table. The others were people that I’ve seen around before but just never had a chance to talk to.

When everything was over and done with, we all paid our share of the bill. This was where things started to get a little complicated. When we were shown to our table, the waitress said that she had counted nineteen people. That couldn’t have been correct because not every seat in our section was being occupied. There were a couple of people that left early but they paid before they left. And when everyone chipped in their part, nobody paid the exact price. Everyone was rounding it to $30 so it would cover tips and stuff. But because they counted wrong, we were short about $60.

It was a bit complicated because one of my friends wasn’t eating. He was only there to have a drink. Another friend kept moving from table to table and that made the waitress count him twice. We had a friend come over from another part of the restaurant to visit so I think she was counted as well.

According to our count, we had seventeen people but the waitress counted nineteen. My table had ten seats and all ten were occupied. The other table had maybe seven people so that brings out total to seventeen. Another girl shows up around 8:00pm which brings us to eighteen. Dave was the one that was just there for drinks and didn’t eat so he shouldn’t have to pay for a meal which drops us down to seventeen. Mike and Frasier eventually moved over to the other table and that is probably where the extra two people came from.

It’s simple math, really and we shouldn’t have had to argue our point to the waitress but she was really under the impression that there were nineteen people. The other table had two empty seats so already her math was wrong. Plus Dave wasn’t eating but she kept counting our table as ten which meant she counted Dave as well. Even if it sounded like she subtracted him from the list, somewhere down the road she ended up adding him back in.

In the end, the get together was awesome. I had a blast just sitting around and talking to friends and old coworkers. It’s nice to get together during the holidays especially for my friend since they had just finished exams. After all this, I still have a more dinners to attend to. There’s a company Christmas party that’s going on tonight, a friend’s birthday tomorrow and another Christmas dinner on the 26th. I think my stomach as room for a little more.

Mandarin group shot

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