Hairy Women

I was chatting with a friend the last night and she mentioned that she just saw something on tv about a ‘No Scruf’ campaign. It’s a campaign where women will not shaven unless men do. I saw the commercial and it is not a pretty sight. I’ve seen a few hairy women around town and one or two is bad enough. But to have a whole group of them protesting, you better watch out. That’s scarier than being chased by Teletubbies.

The National Organization of Social Crusaders Repulsed by Unshaven Faces, or ‘NO SCRUF’ for short is an organization that was supposedly started on January 14, 2006. Oddly enough, that’s a day after my birthday. I wonder if they started rallying because of me. I haven’t shaved for a while either. Coincident? I think not. Here’s what they had to say.

NoScruf (National Organization of Social Crusaders Repulsed by Unshaven Faces) announced today its formation for the purpose of ending the trend of prickly, scratchy, unshaven faces. “To put it simply, we’re not going to shave until men do,” said founder and swimsuit model Terry Tarentelli.

Tarentelli said of her reasons for founding the organization, “It’s just not fair. We shave. We’re smooth. But somehow guys think it’s okay for them to be stubbly. They’ve left us with only one option. To fight hair with hair!

NoScruf is growing in numbers by the day, and expects the response among scruffy guys to be one of utter revulsion. One analyst noted, “We can project that this movement will bring the male community to its knees.” He continued, “If they cry and want their mommies too, well, that’s just gravy for NoScruf.”

I saw the video and all the girls in there are hot! The setting was during a protesting where the girls are behind some sort of barricade and they’re all chanting ‘No scruf! No scruf! No scruf!’ They show a few hairy women on the front line, speaking their minds. After they were done speaking, they raised their arms and started chanting. That is when you get to see their hairy armpits. But even the ones with the hairy armpits! It doesn’t seem like they’re going to win if all their spokesperson look hot with hairy armpits.

But in the commercial, they bring out the heavy artillery. Stubble Boy goes to a bar and sees a hot bartender. She turns around to ask him what he wants but he couldn’t say anything because he was shocked to she her uni-brow. I don’t care what gender or nationality you are but uni-brown looks funny of anybody. I think I have a light uni-brow going on right now.

Stubble Boy turns to see his girlfriend with a guy who is clean shaven. Actually, in the bar, everyone who hasn’t shaved is sitting around by themselves. There’s a fat guy who has a clean shaved face and he’s got two hot girls fighting over him. So, he sees his girlfriend with another guy. She seems to like the guy because he has a smooth face. She turns to look at him and shrugs. She goes in for the kiss and that’s when he wakes up from his nightmare and runs into the washroom to shave. After he’s done, he goes to join his girlfriend in bed. She turns and puts her leg on him so she goes to caress it to make sure that it was actually a dream. His girlfriend wakes up and says some stuff. He is suddenly frightened because he sees her with a full grown beard which turns out to be his imagination.

I don’t know what’s so bad about having a beard. I don’t have a thick one but if it does become thick it doesn’t hurt when I rub it. In their commercial, it showed a guy with a stubble who goes around town and encounters a lot of hairy women. I don’t know about anyone else but my stubbles have never been prickly enough to pop a balloon. I haven’t shaved in a while and I might keep it that way. I’m just too lazy to slap on some shaving cream and start shaving. I’ll shaving when I’m going somewhere important. If I was dating a girl who agrees with No Scruf and ends up being a bit hairy, I probably wouldn’t mind too much. It’s when she starts growing the uni-brow and the beard, that’s when I’ll start to get scared.

The crazy ideas that people come up with are pretty funny. Ladies, just say “no” to “No Scruf.” If you want your man to shave, ask him. If he doesn’t then tie him down and shave him while he’s sleeping. There’s no need for you to retaliate and start letting your armpit hair grow long. That’s not right on so many levels.

Visit the No Scruf Website