Predictions for 2006

Since it’s the beginning of a new year, I thought I’d try out my new psychic powers and predict the events of 2006. Based on past research data and the power of probability, here’s what I’ve come up with.

Bush gets impeached. A lot of American are are unsatisified with the way Bush is handling world issues. He did nothing during 9/11 and he did nothing during Hurrican Katrina. So, that’s what he’ll be doing, nothing because he’ll be out of the job. Don’t forget, according to Kanye West, he doesn’t like black people.

Global warming is going to get worse. Although the price of gas is sky high, people can’t seem to stop driving. In order to reduce the number of cars on the road, the 403 opened a car pool lane. At first, it didn’t attract a lot of drivers because nobody seems to want to car pool. Anyone caught in that lane without a passenger will be stopped by the OPP. The OPP will then proceed to slap your wrist and ask that you please switch back to the regular lane. Man, those guys are strict!

Chronicles of Don voted ‘Blog of the Year!’ I don’t know how it happened, but it happened. I would like to thank everyone who voted for me. I never thought I would get such a prestigious honour of being amongst the top bloggers in the world. And last but not least, I would like to thank the man upstairs because through him, everything is possible! Halleluiah!

Signs of life found on Mars. NASA’s Mars rover Opportunity detected faint life on martian soil. After finding a dried up river bed, a closer examination showed indication that life once existed in the area. Now that they’ve found some signs of life on Mars, NASA’s next mission is to attempt to find signs of intelligent life on Earth.

The number of accidents in Hamilton is proportionate to the number of one way streets that became two way streets. With a ratio of 50:1, every Hamiltonian are having a close encounter with the car in the next lane everyday. Nobody can read the road signs and people are playing destruction derby every five kilometers. Even pedestrians are joining in on the fun. They just jump out in the middle of the street and taunt you while you’re stopped at the light. And once that light turns green, you accidentally run them over and didn’t notice. Whoops, I didn’t know they had speed bumps around here…

That’s about it, not a very bright future ahead but what can you do? I’ll tell you what you can do. You can vote for me! Don’t ask me how though, I didn’t see that part in one of my vision. You’re on your own there. But if I get anymore glimpse of the future, I’ll let you know about it…. Oh wait, I see something now. I see you… What’s this? you’re sitting a computer! And you’re reading a blog! Which blog? Wait, I see, The Chronic-what-cles? It’s a little fuzzy, I can’t see to make it out but if it’s a vision, it’s gotta come true right?